September 29, 2020

Five Shows That Should Kick the Bucket

posted on: Thursday October 6, 2011

Haley Webster ’14 / A&E Staff

Jersey Shore

Remember when Jersey Shore was so bad it was good? Well, now it’s so bad that it’s just plain terrible. After three seasons of “smushing,” fist pumping, and grenades, we have come to realize that the cast is truly as dumb as it appears. Not one of them is being mildly intelligent or using the show to his or her advantage. None of these Jersey elites wants a perfume deal or vodka sponsorship—they just want to get bombed. I’m sure the $30,000 they get paid for each episode doesn’t hurt either. If you do the math, MTV is paying the entire cast $1.8 million each season. Not to go all save-the-earth on you, but imagine if MTV just canceled the show and donated the money to, I don’t know, the Red Cross or FEMA. Moral of the story: If “Jersday” is your equivalent to Christmas, then you should probably re-evaluate your life.

Watch this instead: A blank screen. (No, really, if you like Jersey Shore then you’ll love watching a blank screen—they are equally entertaining.)

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