March 17, 2018

Tiffany and Earl

Photo courtesy of

Dear Tiff and Earl,

Where do I go now that Alumni Hall is closed on Sunday nights? I have no desire to kill myself on Guzman Stairs while trying to get to Eaton Street Café.




Dear Hangry,


To be honest, the new hours in Alumni are just pissing me off. It’s obvious why Sodexo closed Alum on Sundays. They want us to go to the Eaton Street Café or get mozzarella sticks in McPhail’s (barf).

After all this nonsense, I’m canceling my meal plan, and am going to spend the semester eating out from Thayer Street and Federal Hill. Providence has so many good restaurants and I’m going to use this as an opportunity to eat out as much as I can, preferably at a place that offers organic fat and gluten  free turkey burgers that are made from free-range turkeys and do not contain any GMOs.




Dear SodexNO,

No need to venture down to lower campus. The wonderful and mysterious interwebs have brought us the magic of UberEats, Yelp Eat24, GrubHub, etc. The greasiest food in all of Providence is at your fat little fingertips thanks to the most “millennial” of all apps.


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