Tiff & Earl

by Andrea Traietti on August 30, 2018


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Dear Tiff and Earl,

What should I do to make this semester my best one yet?

Sincerely,
Thirsty for Knowledge

 

Dear Thirsty for Knowledge,

Buy all your textbooks, binders, and Five Star notebooks from the bookstore for all your classes. Organize your desk real nice with a Providence College calendar, pens and pencils, and every single piece of stationary that Target sells. Go to class and realize it’s all pointless because your professor gives homework as if you only have that class. Then, go back to your room, cry in your bed, and wipe your tears with the pages of all the books you rented but will never read. Realize every semester is the worst one and this one certainly won’t be any different.

Love,
Tiff

 

Dear Thirsty Thursday,

All of my best semesters have included a lack of willpower, a couple open-container violations, and…I can’t remember the rest.

Maybe that’s because of what was in the containers…

-Earl