by Kate Ward ’23 The painting had been sitting across from the Greek statue for the past 50 or so years, and she had never grown tired of looking at him. His body was strong but not in the ways women liked now; he was strong like a field hand or someone with a […]
by AJ Worsley ’22 it’s not that i didn’t have the time, in fact, it’s precisely the opposite. i had too much time, too much time on my hands with nobody to occupy it. but if you keep with that attitude you’ll only ever have friendships, never any best friendships. everyone else […]
Dear Tiff and Earl, None of my professors can ever find dry-erase markers. Where have they all gone? Sincerely, Weekend Whiteboard Worrier Dear Weekend Whiteboard Worrier, Your professors know exactly where those markers are. This is a power play. When your professor is fumbling at the podium, and her eyes start darting […]
by Fiona Clarke ’23 The burning sun runs its blazing hands along the wildcat, The ocean, upsets it, and offers a remedy then. Take and dissolve beneath your tongue—How often?— As often as you need—For how long?— Until you, yourself, dissolve. How can there still be water? For crying out loud there is a […]
by AJ Worsley ’22 I’ve been here for about six…ish days now. It’s dreary and anxiety inducing. My mother always told me that hospitals should be considered a safe place because if anything were to go wrong with your health, who’s going to address it faster than doctors in a hospital? Better to have a […]
by Aidan Lerner ’22 I think the Career Fair would have been a great place to croak. I mean, kick the bucket in a dramatic fashion. I walk in there with the stylish, pressed suit my dad picked out for me. I am dressed to the nines, with perfectly styled hair and an aroma […]
by Kate Ward ’23 Over the past two years I have been engaged in a long-winded legal battle. A decision was finally made and I have lost my church building as a result. Now it’s up to me to find a new place for my congregation to meet, and even worse: It’s Saturday and I […]
Dear Tiff & Earl, How do I protect myself from contracting the PC Plague? Everyone has walking pneumonia and keeps lifting their mask in the middle of class to cough and sneeze. Sincerely, At Least It’s Not COVID Dear At Least It’s Not COVID, Believe you me, I know it’s hard when you’re the only […]
by Taylor Maguire ’24 I moved to Boston during a very epochal phase of my life. The studio I came upon by chance and moved into last November was nestled in between coffee shops and boutiques that sold jewelry more expensive than my rent; it was a complete hidden gem. It had the occasional mouse […]
Who Should Perform At Late Night Madness? Strictly Speaking Special Guest Anaclastic Friar Dom and Huxley as a duet The Yodeling Kid (Mason Ramsey) The Wiggles Dixie D’Amelio Trisha Paytas Lil Nas X’s baby The PC Pep Band Father Shanley Alabama sorority girls Fifth graders doing the Whip and Nae-Nae The Hype House