Category: Satire

Tiff and Earl

Dear Tiff and Earl, My boyfriend won’t take me on a Valentine’s Day date because it’s too close to Super Bowl Sunday. Should I ditch him for Joe Burrow? Sincerely, Big Bengals Fan Dear Big Bengals Fan, Don’t give up on your man just yet! With a little creativity, you can have your cake and […]

trogers5

How to write about love, when you yourself are not in love:

Kathryn Libertini ’23 Download Tinder and Hinge for inspiration. Scroll through the apps with your roommates, creating narratives and citing opinions that will most likely never materialize (but, hey, there’s a chance). Delete Tinder and Hinge. Tell your roommates Valentine’s Day is a “Hallmark Holiday” incentivized by capitalism. Watch How to Lose a Guy in […]

trogers5

Heist

Kate Ward ’23 My piece of art had been hanging in that museum for far too long. I was never entirely on board with the fact that the museum would take it and display it, and I wanted it back—it was a masterpiece, after all. I called and emailed and called again, but the museum […]

trogers5

An Honest Discussion About Parietals

by Aidan Lerner ’22 As Cowl readers will know, parietals have been in effect since women were introduced to Providence College in 1971. Their purpose was to encourage same-sex intimacy among first year students before they are exposed to the free world of non-gendered dorms. Is this performative wokeness? Sure. But in fairness to the […]

The Cowl Editor

Thankful: A DWC Paper 

By: Aidan Lerner ’22 Since the beginning of time when the first man evolved from clay or fish or from apes, there has been higher education (I would assume). Aidan Lerner ’22 is a current student at Providence College who thinks positively about his experience. Lerner is a finance major, a writing minor, and a […]

The Cowl Editor

The Fried Chicken Song

by Marelle Hipolito ’22   I ate some fried chicken yesterday It tasted good to eat my worries away  I saw my friend in the hallway  But I hit a locker and it took my breath away I went to stats, we had a happy frappy Made me realize that my life was so crappy  […]

The Cowl Editor

Parking Passes: But At What Cost?

by Kathryn Libertini ’23  This week, when walking through the Fennel parking lot, I witnessed a black Jeep getting towed. Behind it, a student, presumably on the phone with a fellow student, exclaimed, “Bro they’re towing my car right now, my parents are gonna kill me. What? Yeah, I had tickets. No, I didn’t pay […]

The Cowl Editor

Golf Party: Civil War

by Aidan Lerner ’22   This past week, the Providence College senior class was torn asunder by a significant conflict centered around the bi-annual event, Golf Party. Sources confirmed that a portion of the class would have preferred to host the Eaton Street bash this past Saturday, while the other group fought to have it […]

The Cowl Editor

Listomania: Things I Forgot at Home

  Supplies for the elaborate prank I had planned on my roommates A fan…I guess I’ll just melt The pet hamster I was going to smuggle in All of my Friars merch My Goldfish stash Motivation for classes A pair of party shoes  Room decor that’ll make my dorm look less depressing  Shower shoes… hopefully […]

The Cowl Editor

Tiff and Earl

    Dear Tiff and Earl, It’s been so long since I’ve had to attend class in person. I’m so used to sitting on my bed and using my phone during class. How do I adjust to being a normal, functioning student again? Sincerely, Still In My Pajamas   Dear Sloth, It’s a good idea, […]

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