by Aidan Lerner ’22 The Pauper burst out of the foliage, his makeshift chainmail clanking and disturbing the Sphinx’s slumber. His armor was singed, and he was walking with a limp. The Sphinx got to her feet slowly to block his path. “Who dares cross?” she snarled. “I do,” the Pauper replied, “and I […]
Even if you don’t have a Valentine today, You’ll have half-priced candy tomorrow. Sarah McLaughlin ’23 Are you a bank loan? Because you have my interest. Kate Ward ’23 Forever thanks to my very best friend for all of our memories! Without you, I wouldn’t know the very best of me. Marelle Hipolito […]
Dear Tiff and Earl, My boyfriend won’t take me on a Valentine’s Day date because it’s too close to Super Bowl Sunday. Should I ditch him for Joe Burrow? Sincerely, Big Bengals Fan Dear Big Bengals Fan, Don’t give up on your man just yet! With a little creativity, you can have your cake and […]
Kathryn Libertini ’23 Download Tinder and Hinge for inspiration. Scroll through the apps with your roommates, creating narratives and citing opinions that will most likely never materialize (but, hey, there’s a chance). Delete Tinder and Hinge. Tell your roommates Valentine’s Day is a “Hallmark Holiday” incentivized by capitalism. Watch How to Lose a Guy in […]
Kate Ward ’23 By the time of his lunch break, Edmund was exhausted from an early morning preparing a case to defend his client. It wasn’t looking good, and frankly, Edmund had little faith that his client would get out of this unscathed. He walked outside to the loud street and waited under a […]
Biggest Red Flags Asked me out to the PC basketball game Is a business major Has a pet monkey Doesn’t read The Cowl Is in their red hair phase (no offense, Sarah) Goes to URI Is Nate Jacobs (from Euphoria) Posts regularly on Yik Yak Gets hazelnut or pecan flavored coffee Has a favorite song […]
AJ Worsley ’22 Light a candle, admit your flaws, set the tone. Don’t let the process turn your heart to stone. Find warmth in lost love, but always try to keep it in your sight. The best love poems are written after the love has gone to light. Compare your lover to […]
Taylor Maguire ’24 They don’t tell you when you’re a kid that love is depressing. When you’re five, you start watching movies that project the happily-ever-after trope, and as you continue on through middle school, your curiosity grows on the concept. Then high school rolls around, and you listen to music that praises the pretty […]
Book Review: Ugly Love A Perfect Valentine’s Heartbreaker Tully Mahoney ’23 Those who find themselves on “BookTok” have likely heard of Ugly Love. For those who do not, this novel is written by no. 1 New York Times Bestselling Author Colleen Hoover, a romance novel genius. Hoover has an exceptional ability to write with passion, […]
Questions of Truth and Falsehood in Things I Should Have Said A Look at Jamie Lynn Spears’ Controversial New Book Although much recent media attention has centered on Britney Spears’ conservatorship, another member of the Spears family is now making waves. Britney Spears’ sister, Jamie Lynn Spears, recently released a memoir entitled Things I Should […]