Tiffany and Earl

by The Cowl Editor on March 1, 2018


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Dear Tiff and Earl,

What are your essential items for spring break traveling?  I’m trying to figure out what to bring and could use advice from seasoned veterans like you.


Potential Packer


Dear Potential Packer,

I have multiple essential items for spring break. Here they are:

  1. My very worn copy of Fifty Shades of Grey
  2. Malibu Beach Babe Tanning Oil
  3. Six pairs of sunglasses to go accordingly with each bikini I plan on wearing
  4. Alcohol (if you’re of age, of course!)
  5. A very large and very floppy sunhat
  6. Slimfast or green tea (to help with the bloating from all the alcohol)
  7. Make-up wipes
  8. All of the hair products I own

I hope this helps.




Dear Todd Packer,

Clean underwear and plenty of cash.