by Aidan Bennett '24
Greetings, fellow sports bettors. One of our best weeks for sports gambling has come, and oh boy am I friared up for it. Not only do I have locks, but I also have a system. This is not your average system; it is highly formulated as I pored over years of data. March Madness might seem crazy and unpredictable, but I will simplify it all right here.
My system is quite simple. The one constant in March Madness is the madness. We know there will be upsets in the first weekend because the selection committee put Purdue and UConn in top seeds. It is hard to predict which teams will choke. My system is to bet all 12, 13, and 14 seeds to win outright in each game. Each one has massive upside potential for the underdogs, and some are bound to hit. The only kink is to bet against Marquette instead of Gonzaga because Marquette should not be a 2 seed. With all of our longshots, most won’t hit, but we only need 4 of our 12 bets to hit. When they do, we are certain to make some dough to play with for the rest of the tournament.
In summary, we must take Furman, Oral Roberts, Vermont, Drake, Kent State, VCU, Iona, Kennesaw State, Montana State, USBC, Charleston and UL Lafayette to win their first-round matchups. Some of them will be able to sneak through to make some serious cash. If you can put a half unit on each of the 12 bets, those six units can become upwards of 20 units. The big sportsbooks are starting to track me for exposing their secrets, I’m not sure how long I have left.
On top of this, there are some teams to definitely avoid this March. Teams like Purdue, UConn, Marquette, and UCLA should be avoided. None of them could come into the AMP and walk out with a win. If they can’t handle the madness of the AMP, they can’t handle the madness of March. If any of these teams win their first game, they fade them strongly in the second round. Take this free money and enjoy your St. Patrick’s Day. Get some Shammy Shakes with the boys and just root for madness.
As always gambling can be addictive and if you feel you have an issue call 1-800-GAMBLER for help. Gambling should only be done within your means with money you can afford to lose.