by Christina Charie '25 on November 9, 2023
Opinion Editor
Portfolio
Breaking news emerged from the Taylor Nation Universe today as Taylor Swift announced TS 11 on social media, but its name is unexpected. As Swifties stalked Swift’s every move, they noticed that she was wearing orange in all of her recent outfits in addition to a bracelet with “Karma” engraved on it. This was a clear sign that Karma was coming, or so everyone thought.
Instead, Swift announced that her album would be called “Chief,” which is not a reference to any relationship she has been in recently. This is definitely cause for confusion since Swift has been spotted sitting next to Donna Kelce, Kansas City Chiefs player Travis Kelce’s mom, at recent games. However, an insider source revealed that Kelce and Swift never dated. Despite images of Kelce driving the getaway car, he is simply friends with Swift.
Kelce commented that he is “excited that Swift let the Chiefs use her stadium during the football season” and “wanted to thank her.”
It is also reported that NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell recently purchased a new multimillion-dollar mansion now that Swift has made football relevant again.
Goodell, in a statement, said that he “wanted Swift to perform at the Super Bowl, but this is the next best thing for my paycheck.”
Fans are in uproar over the sudden change after decoding thousands of cryptic messages to draw pointless conclusions as to what Swift is doing. Thus, fans have taken to TikTok to figure out how to break into Swift’s house and discover her master plan hidden in the vault since she “will not share enough about her personal life with fans.”