by trogers5 on March 3, 2022

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Features

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Professor Red Flags I Wish I Noticed Earlier in the Semester:

• No syllabus week
• Small word counts for essays (only for English/Creative Writing  majors)
• Long word counts for essays (for every other major)
• Asks for papers single-spaced
• Wants printed and digital copies
• No laptops allowed in class (they’re cutting into my online shopping time…)
• Printing out every handout for class
• Plugs their own journal articles
• Has group projects
• Cold-calls
• Gives oral exams
• Doesn’t reply to emails
• Emails too much
• Doesn’t let you use the bathroom
• Gets mad when someone uses the bathroom
• Not enough office hours
• Doesn’t take off their jacket
• Uses a chalkboard (and doesn’t mind the squeaking)
• “I don’t really give out As…”
• Doesn’t use Sakai
• Doesn’t learn anyone’s names
• Makes due dates midnight instead of 11:59 p.m.

by trogers5 on February 10, 2022

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Features

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Biggest Red Flags

• Asked me out to the PC basketball game
• Is a business major
• Has a pet monkey
• Doesn’t read The Cowl
• Is in their red hair phase (no offense, Sarah)
• Goes to URI
• Is Nate Jacobs (from Euphoria)
• Posts regularly on Yik Yak
• Gets hazelnut or pecan flavored coffee
• Has a favorite song from Certified Lover Boy
• Doesn’t thank the UG2 workers
• Prefers Ray over Alum
• Makes thirst traps on TikTok 
• Chooses Old’s over Brad’s 
• Doesn’t like Chicken Nugget Thursdays
• Posted about their lost Airpods on the PC mobile app
• Lives in Guzman
• Calls Suites “McCarthy”
• Doesn’t like Dean Sears’s emails
• Willingly has an 8:30 every day
• Has a red “Saturdays are for the boys” flag
• Picked me.