by AJ Worsley ’22
happier when i’m away, i do my best to keep a distance.
all i hope for is that while i’m away you forget my existence.
if that were to happen, i’d have no reason to return,
you don’t know what you have until it’s gone, a lesson you’ve yet to learn.
pick and choose between red pill, blue pill, but why pick one?
take it all for yourself, everybody prefers a purple tongue.
these things are never easy, and i don’t belong here,
this danger creates anxiety, like a highway for a deer.
i want off the rollercoaster, i’m nauseous and numb
these loops and turns have stripped me of sympathy and i’m not having fun.
it’s like a dwindling flame, and every time the fire wishes to die
you bring it back to life with some gasoline and a thoughtless lie.
always everyone else’s fault that you’re so alone,
God gave you a body but you just have to show bone.
i’m either selfish or depressed there is no escape,
in constant battle with myself where thoughts take new shape.
both parties can’t win, so who do i choose?
myself for the first time, or you? a lose-lose.
so tell me, why should i be your savior,
if there are no rewards for good behavior?