November 20, 2018

Posts from "Features"

  • Features | Nov.19, 2018

    Tiff and Earl

    Dear Tiff and Earl, I do not want to go home for Thanksgiving because I know my pesky relatives will ask what I am doing with my post-grad life this spring. Truth is I have no idea and I will…

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  • Features | Nov.19, 2018

    Listomania: What Do Friar Dom and Huxley Do Over Thanksgiving Break

    Reenact Charlie Brown Thanksgiving Hunt squirrels on electric scooters Go on a ghost hunting expedition in the tunnels under Howley Jump in piles of leaves Feast on Ray cold cuts Listen to Mariah Carey’s “All I Want for Christmas is…

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  • Features | Nov.19, 2018

    Listomania: Absolutely Real State Laws

    In Texas, astronauts can vote from space. In Alabama, you cannot wear a fake mustache that causes laughter in church. In Rhode Island, you cannot drag race horses on the highway. In some towns in Virginia, you cannot go trick…

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  • Features | Nov.19, 2018

    Tiff and Earl

    Dear Tiff and Earl, My boyfriend will only answer someone when they refer to him as Darth Kicka**. He is failing school right now and our relationship is on the rocks. What should I do? You’re my only hope, Leia…

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  • Features | Nov.01, 2018

    Listomania: I Wish I Wrote My College Essay About…

    Getting my first library card When my grandmother got run over by a reindeer When I shot my brother (with a BB gun) The time I tripped up the stairs in front of my crush When I dropped my box…

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  • Features | Nov.01, 2018

    Tiff and Earl

    Dear Tiff and Earl, Halloween is over now, and I can’t be Scrappy Doo anymore. I am currently having an identity crisis. How do I be myself again? Woefully, Scrappy Don’t   Hi Scrappy Don’t, First of all, thank you…

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  • Features | Oct.25, 2018

    Tiff and Earl

    Dear Tiff and Earl, What do people do here on Halloween? Is trick-or-treating still a thing and if so where? Because caffeine isn’t getting me through midterms and I need some candy asap. Sincerely, Sugar Fiend   Dear Sugar Fiend,…

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  • Features | Oct.25, 2018

    Listomania: Couples’ Costumes

    Kris Dunn & Coach Cooley Huxley & Friar Dom Dot & Fran Dean Sears & His Running Stick PC Squirrel & Trash Can Martha Stewart & Snoop Dogg Pete Davidson & Ariana Grande (Too Soon?) Chicken Nugget & Curly Fry…

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  • Features | Oct.25, 2018

    Halloween Haikus

    TickTok TickTok Tick I feel it running after me Its breath on my neck. —Jessica Polanco ’20   I can’t feel myself. No one hears me talk to them Is this death for me? —Connor Zimmerman ’20   I hear…

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  • Features | Oct.25, 2018

    Ghost Stories

    The Carson Killer He didn’t want to get caught. The day he was suspected the shadows scratched across the hardwood floors of 29 Carson Avenue, as though the sun were trying to drag them to the basement. Day or night…

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