Listomania: Ways to Get Accepted into College

by The Cowl Editor on March 21, 2019


Cure cancer

Join a fake crew team

Sell your soul

Have your parents get a second job at the college

Create your own college

Live in a tent on campus and go to classes until they give you a degree

Know a guy

Become a prodigy

Ask Lori Loughlin for advice

Lower your expectations

Get hit by a car while visiting campus

Donate the Torch

Be a well-rounded student-athlete with an amazing resume, extracurriculars, and a good personality, and hope that is enough