Friartire: DormWars AQuties vs Suities

by The Cowl Editor on October 3, 2019


by Sally Satirist ’20

As the warm darty season passes into a chilly autumn, residence halls prepare for another annual showdown. While Eaton St. remains a monument to late night life, dorms have been recently rising in Friday and Saturday night notoriety. 

Suites Hall, the suite-style upperclassmen dorm, is the traditional spot for on-campus shenanigans. The large common space areas provide ample room for games and activites, with plenty of spots for spectators. 

The apartments Cunningham, Ditraglia, and Mal Brown, all receive honorable mentions, but none compare to the hoards of freshmen and sophomores banging on the entrance doors to Suites on weekend nights.

However, last year witnessed the emergence of a tour de force in Aquinas Hall. The sophomore dorm, famous for closet-sized rooms and communal bathrooms, emerged as a contender for the place to be at night. The underdog had previously been a pregame watering hole before heading down to Suites or Eaton. This all changed with the propaganda machine AQ_memes.

The instagram account, created in March 2019, devotes itself entirely to the promotion of the virtues of Aquinas Hall. Weekly content highlights the residents, deemed “AQuties,” resident assistants, and dorm antics as a whole. All posts are angled to expose the superiority of Aquinas Hall in relation to Suites Hall. 

AQ_memes has revolutionized the dorm battles; with over 1,800 followers, Aquinas has a devoted base that will fight to the bitter end against Suites. No comparable Suites account exists.

While the virtual fanbase of Aquinas dwarves that of Suites, a stroll around campus on weekends proves that PC’s preference is still Suites Hall. In order to win the war, AQuties will need to throw a major banger to match their social media tenacity.