by The Cowl Editor on October 5, 2017
Features
Dear Tiff and Earl,
Why is Ruane Café NOT open on weekends? I find this a terrible and grave injustice. How can I live without my nightly Allie’s Donut and caramel macchiato?
Sincerely,
Weekdays Are For Losers
Dear Weekends are for Losers,
I have no idea why the Ruane Café is not open on weekends. I agree, it not being open is stupid, especially as fall is upon us.
Anything pumpkin spice is my drink of choice, and having to go a whole weekend without a $5 Starbucks drink is brutal.
I don’t have an answer for you, but I’d be happy to lead the charge and get this changed.
Love,
Tiff
Dear Loser,
Why are you so worried about the Ruane Café? Don’t you get your fill of Sodexo during the week? I say SodexNO!!
Plus, eating a donut and drinking that sugary slime every day isn’t healthy. You know what is healthy? Everything that comes down from the beautifully greasy Yuck Truck.
Leave your fake love for Italian beverages and bastardized pastries behind. Embrace the truly American cuisine that only an establishment such as Haven Bros. can purvey.
Better luck this weekend,
Earl