September 27, 2020

Posts from "Features"

  • Features | Feb.14, 2020

    Fast Fiction: Dream First Date

    In six words or less write a story about your dream first date… Go! Only us drowned in candlelight. by Grace O’Connor ’22   A good laugh…all I need. by Erin Venuti ’20   Netflix, Hulu, Amazon Prime, Disney+, and……

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  • Features | Feb.14, 2020

    Listomania: How to make someone fall in love with you

    Stand outside their dorm room with a boombox Leave them on open on Snapchat DM their ex on Instagram Take them out to Ray Photoshop them into pictures with you Bring them chicken nuggets on Thursday Go to the chapel…

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  • Features | Feb.14, 2020

    Tiff and Earl

    Dear Tiff and Earl, I just found out that my significant other is allergic to every single flower known to man and hates all chocolate (I promise she’s fun!), and CVS has nothing else that is Valentine’s Day related. What…

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  • Features | Feb.14, 2020

    Friartire: Showing How You Really Feel

    by Lil Wit ’21 The mushiest, most lovey-dovey, better-not-be-alone-because-that-sucks day of the year (unless you want to be conventional and remember that this day is actually the feast day for a saint who was martyred for the sake of spreading…

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  • Features | Feb.07, 2020

    Listomania: Ways to avoid catching the flu if your roommate has it (not recommended by the Surgeon General)

    Sleep in the library Spray Lysol in their face as they sleep Wear a hazmat suit Gently cover them with a tarp Replace their shampoo with Purell Quarantine them in the tunnels Eat one whole orange Scratch that—eat nothing but…

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  • Features | Jan.30, 2020

    Listomania: Other ways Ray could have listened

    Move the pizza again (it’s messing with my feng shui) Bring back the panini station Give me iced tea or give me death Paint it in a neoclassical style Carpet all of Ray (and I mean all of it) Have…

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  • Features | Jan.30, 2020

    Tiff and Earl

    Dear Tiff and Earl, I was late to my class one morning, and when I arrived there were no seats in the room. I had to sit in the corner next to the professor by myself like a fool. What…

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  • Features | Jan.16, 2020

    Listomania: Things that I learned last semester

    Mint Juul pods are illegal  I cannot responsibly manage my money (or Friar Bucks)  They lied to me on the tour about Ray Men’s basketball will never be able to hit their free throws I paid $5k for a class…

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  • Features | Jan.16, 2020

    Tiff and Earl

    Dear Tiff and Earl, I had so much down time over winter break that I started pondering the meaning of the universe and now I’m having a quarter-life crisis. I think I want to drop out of school and move…

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  • Christmas | Dec.07, 2019

    Friartire: Beware the Fruit Cakes! (And other Holiday Treats)

    by Lil Elf ’21 It’s that time of year again.  There is an unquantifiable amount of glorious aromas emitting from the oven (or maybe it’s just a candle).  With the Christmas season inevitably comes the Christmas goodies.  However, some people…

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